From last Saturday until yesterday afternoon Fraser and I had been down at my parents' house, enjoying a little vacation time while we had the floor in the living room refinished. Fraser had a great time on our visit, and it always impresses me how much he seems to progress when he has a captive audience like his grandparents. For example, he has now started to say "outside" when he wants to go outside to play. Sure, not everyone can understand what he's trying to say, but I can, and that works for me! He got to go the beach twice while we there (see the snap above) and had a great time playing in, and eating, the sand.

We had family over for lunch on Sunday and Fraser got to hang out with his second cousin Tommy (I think it's second cousin, it could be first cousin once removed, someday I'll figure that out). As you can see in the photo my cousin Leah (Tommy's mom) and I were both pregnant at the time. I say "were" because Leah had her baby, a healthy baby boy, this morning! I am trying not to be too super jealous that she is no longer pregnant since it (perhaps wrongly, but nevertheless) was somewhat of a comfort to me on Sunday to learn she was just as uncomfortable and feeling just as ludicrously large as I am. Alas, now I am back to feeling like the only part-human-part-cow on the planet. (On a side note, we went out to dinner last night and our waitress did nothing to alleviate my fear that I am on the verge of developing my own climate when she revealed that she was 7 months pregnant. I would not even have guessed that she was pregnant unless she told me. I mean, for God's sake, the woman was wearing a shirt tucked in to her pants and I still couldn't tell. There should be some sort of law against that.)

Fraser also got to visit my mother's kindergarten class Wednesday morning. She has been telling her students about Fraser all year and it was adorable how excited they all were when he walked in. At first Fraser was shy and a bit overwhelmed by all the attention, but after a little while he seemed to think it was perfectly normal to be coloring a table with 15 adoring five year-olds jockeying for position just to stand beside him. It's tough to be so adored by the public.

Of course it is good that Fraser has times when he impresses me with his poise and maturity, because there are definitely times lately when I just want to throttle him. When I'm trying to get him to walk somewhere that he doesn't want to go he has taken to throwing himself onto the ground. So, for example, when we were leaving school this morning he decided half way across the road that he wanted to stop and play with the leaves in the road. I, being a caring mother and not wishing to see my child end up as road kill, felt this was a bad idea. So I took his hand (not an easy proposition since I (a) was carrying the diaper bag (b) was carrying a tray of cupcakes and (c) am large enough that bending down to Fraser-hand-level alone is not without its challenges) and started to lead him to the sidewalk. Fraser starts screaming and throws himself at the ground. I lifted him up by his arm onto his feat and said rather sternly "You may not lie in the street!" He yells louder and throws himself down again. This time I had had it. I picked him up by one arm and carried him, yelling his little head off, to the sidewalk. There I set him on his feet and said "here, you can play with these leaves." So, he threw himself at the ground again, only this time I wasn't holding his hand so her smashed into the ground and proceeded to howl like I was beating him with a stick. Not wishing to attract an audience to Fraser's little display of independence, I finally just picked him up (while still holding the diaper bag and cupcakes) and hauled him to the car.

From there, believe it or not, we had to go to a birthday party. I considered just skipping it and taking his-royal-cranky-pants directly home, but I figured we should at least put in an appearance and if Fraser decided to behave like a toad we would just leave. I am very very glad we went, not only because Fraser was actually very well behaved, but also because there was a child there who was so horribly behaved he made Fraser's tantrums look minor. This other child, who I shall call "Archie," was so horrible I was actually shocked. Archie will be three in December and when the child whose birthday it was was playing with a car that Archie wanted Archie (1) demanded the car and when it wasn't delivered (2) began to scream and cry the fakest tears I have ever seen and then (3) when that didn't work he picked up another car and threw it hard at the birthday boy's head (yes he made contact). Now, this was egregious behavior, but could have been chalked up to being overtired or overwhelmed by birthday commotion, but when I tell you what Archie's mother's reaction was, you will easily believe that Archie was a horrible little spawn for the remainder of the party (and I'm sure most other days as well).

Immediately upon the heals the car hurling incident, which occurred in the middle of the room and which all the parents witnessed in detail, Archie's mom (and I am not exaggerating here) pulled Archie into her lap and said "Now Archie, that wasn't very nice. It's nice to share other people's toys. You know how sad you are when people won't share with you. We don't throw toys, we share." She said this all in a voice like she was cooing to a distressed kitten. Then she kissed Archie on the head and put him on the floor. I was pretty much just staring at this woman with my mouth hanging open and she says to me "He's such a sensitive boy. He's very advanced for his age and I think sometimes it is hard for him to play well with kids his own age." Yeah. I just continued to stare. Sensitive? Advanced? Funny, where I come from we would call him a spoiled little shithead. Later, when Archie decided to demand another child "share" a toy which Ben refused to give up (no doubt afraid it would be immediately hurled at his face) Archie began his meltdown again, but this time his mother intervened. Good? Well, nice for Ben that he wasn't attacked, but her "intervention" was to take Archie and say "Are you sad that Ben won't share the toy with you? I understand you are frustrated and that is okay. It's okay to be sad and frustrated." And then she nursed him on the couch. I kid you not. There aren't many children I have met and thought "Wow, that kid is sure going to be fucked up when they get older" but I certainly thought that today.

So, all things considered, even Fraser's fits aren't too too bad (though I'm not saying I hope they continue) and he may make up for lots of misdeeds with that impish little smile, but for God's sake if he ever throws a truck at anyone's head and I comfort him on the couch someone please take me out of the room and smack some much needed sense into me.